.. and back out of the phonebooth
Every couple of years or so, I get the urge to shed my virtual identity. Actually identity is probably too strong of a term, but for me there's a certain amount of baggage tied to the old avatar/alias name, and sometimes it's just time for a change -- the previous persona came about post-grad school when I was starting the new career, and lasted with me through the crazy Montana years and the move to San Diego. Although I wouldn't describe myself as feeling "settled" here yet, the move and the resulting shifts in hobbies and habits is a motivation to start up a new phase.
Hence the the tri-briarian.
After finishing Lavaman in April, and proving to myself that I actually have the determination to complete a race, my current focus is being more disciplined and committed to the training process.
Actually, it seems like a lot of what I'm going through right now has to do with process -- the other big activities in my life include a weekly Artist's Way workshop, and taking spanish lessons -- both of which are all about putting the time into the development, rather than the end goal. And being that I'm goal oriented, tenacious and good at figuring out how to get things done, I've been pretty used to being able to slack on the process and just power through a goal with a minimum of preparation. I'm really in the mood to change that.
The tribriaran name is cute and timely, although I think there is a certain amount of uncertainty as to how long the librarian schtick will last in terms of being a career. My brain certainly seems to be wired well for it, but I'm experiencing the classic "I spend a lot of time doing things that don't have a lot of impact" conundrum. The only solution to which is one of three things:
1. Get better paid for doing the minutae so I feel ok about caring about it
2. Do something more meaningful
3. Realize that although the minutae takes time, I don't have to get emotionally involved
Right now I'm leaning towards #3 -- the last few months have been great conditioning on curbing my workaholic ways (working only 40 hour weeks rock!), but I do still get wrapped around the axle when I am at work. Luckily, I no longer take it home with me, but I would prefer to not give a crap whether or not what I do makes a difference, but just do it and collect my paycheck and concentrate on my play time.
So that's the current basics, there's a lot more going on in terms of life overhaul and technology and people and events and training and all that, but I'll leave it for another day.
Hence the the tri-briarian.
After finishing Lavaman in April, and proving to myself that I actually have the determination to complete a race, my current focus is being more disciplined and committed to the training process.
Actually, it seems like a lot of what I'm going through right now has to do with process -- the other big activities in my life include a weekly Artist's Way workshop, and taking spanish lessons -- both of which are all about putting the time into the development, rather than the end goal. And being that I'm goal oriented, tenacious and good at figuring out how to get things done, I've been pretty used to being able to slack on the process and just power through a goal with a minimum of preparation. I'm really in the mood to change that.
The tribriaran name is cute and timely, although I think there is a certain amount of uncertainty as to how long the librarian schtick will last in terms of being a career. My brain certainly seems to be wired well for it, but I'm experiencing the classic "I spend a lot of time doing things that don't have a lot of impact" conundrum. The only solution to which is one of three things:
1. Get better paid for doing the minutae so I feel ok about caring about it
2. Do something more meaningful
3. Realize that although the minutae takes time, I don't have to get emotionally involved
Right now I'm leaning towards #3 -- the last few months have been great conditioning on curbing my workaholic ways (working only 40 hour weeks rock!), but I do still get wrapped around the axle when I am at work. Luckily, I no longer take it home with me, but I would prefer to not give a crap whether or not what I do makes a difference, but just do it and collect my paycheck and concentrate on my play time.
So that's the current basics, there's a lot more going on in terms of life overhaul and technology and people and events and training and all that, but I'll leave it for another day.
posted by Holly at 9:03 PM
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